I almost died.

Just kidding. I bet ALOT got disappointed that the title was a joke, eh? Hahaha. My apologies. I shouldn't put peoples' hopes up like that.

Truth is, I was almost rushed to the hospital at two in the morning. Stupid lungs.

At around 8:00pm I was already feeling sleepy but decided to fight it para dretso na for the night sleep and stuff. So I read a little, watched a little, ate a little *HAHAHAHAHAHA* At around 11, I decided to hit the sack. Then I started coughing. And I was like, "oh wow. NOW I get a cough. Isn't cough season supposed to be over?" Then it started getting rowdy. And I was like, "Oh you stupid rhinitis. Here you go again!*

So I popped in some Claritin and expected things to be good.

cough cough cough. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH.

ARGH! Why won't the stupid medicine work? So I decided that maybe I've increased tolerance for the drug and decided to pop in ANOTHER 500mg.

cough cough cough. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH.

What the hell???

Is that BLOOD I taste? I'm coughing up BLOOD?

Conscious mind: Do you have TB, Kim?
Subconscious mind: Kim can't have TB! She's always cooped up inside the house. No exposure
Conscious mind: So what can you get from lying around all day? OH! Pneumonia?
Subconscious mind: All she has is a dry cough; and her throat could be raw from all that hacking
Conscious mind: So its her rhinitis again
Subconscious mind: What else could it be?
Conscious mind: But her NOSE is perfectly clear. See? And can't you hear all that crackling and wheezing from her breathing?
Subconscious mind: Asthma? But she doesn't have a history, right?
Conscious mind: She was never diagnosed, if that's what you're thinking. But it's pretty strong in their family history

MOMMY: Kim? KIM?! What's wrong? Do we need to take you to the hospital?

Subconscious: Yes, Kim needs to go to the hospital
Conscious: She'll be given an IV of epinephrine.

ME:

Subconscious: There must be some other way!

MENTAL FLASHBACK: January 19, 2008. Ayala Cebu.

Asthma/rhinitis/whatever you call it attacks again. Was to meet Sheena, Sam, Chi Cindy and Te Chiex.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
ARE YOU OKAY?
HOYYYYY. WRONG MEDICATION! WRONG MEDICATION KA!
COUGH SYRUP/NEOZEP DAPAT! NOT BENADRYL!

Me: *fuzz fuzz fuzz*

END OF FLASHBACK.

Conscious mind: There's Robitussin downstairs. And Neozep's in the first aid kit
Subconscious mind: Robitussin's an expectorant. So it means she'll be coughing up her lungs at this point. I don't think she needs a push in loosening her secretions, if you know what I mean
Conscious mind: Yes, yes. Kim's drinking the Claritin to dilate her airways AND help her sleep
Subconscious mind: But its not enough. We need something to dilate her airways MORE!
Conscious mind: Now. If I were a stupid constricted bronchiole cutting of air, what would I need?

BOTH MINDS: HOT WATER! DRINK HOT WATER!

Mom: Kim? KIM! Come on. I'm bringing you to the hospital. Tin. Ready na the bags. Come on
Me: No. No. I'm okay. Never mind.

Subconscious mind: Fowler's position! Fowler's position!
Conscious mind: HIGH FOWLER'S! HIGH FOWLER'S!
Subconscious mind: NOT WORKING! ORTHOPNEIC POSITION! ORTHOPNEIC POSITION!

LUNGS: Crackle, crackle. Wheeze, wheeze. Crackle, Wheeze.

BRAIN: Dilate, bronchioles! Dilate!

LUNGS: Crackle, wheeze.

BRAIN: *fuzz fuzz*

'Til I fell asleep. It took 1000mg of Claritin to make my brain drowse. Woke up again coz my neck was so stiff from the stupid super high fowler's position.

Gahd, that was terrible! El terrible! :|

Will go to the pulmo tomorrow. I hope I don't need some asthmatic inhaler! They have steroids that make you FAT! :| Maybe I should do some wall climbing? Hmm.

I AM 104% MEAN. HAHAHAHAHAHA

Complete the following questions to find out just how mean you are.

[x] I think I`m gonna have a high score on this.
[ ] I don`t talk to one or both of my parents that much.
[x] I have said horrible things to someone`s face.
[x] I give people disgusting looks sometimes. (99% of the time when I'm grossed out)
[x] I`ve been known to have an attitude.
Total: 4

[x] I took heads off dolls or action
figures when I was little.
[x] I have destroyed something
valuable on purpose.
[x] Most people suck.
[x] I have thrown total tantrums.
Total: 8

[x] I get mad easily.
[x] I have no clue when I`m doing it.
[x] Sometimes I order people around.
[ ] I am/was known around my neighborhood as the kid everyone else doesn`t want their kids hanging out with.
[x] I`ve argued with a teacher. {right, persies?!}
Total: 12

[x] I could honestly care less about school.
[x] I love messing with other people`s heads.
[x] I`ve been told I`m conceited. {i think}
[x] I joke around.
[x] I yell daily.
Total: 17

[x] I seem to always be in a fight with someone.
[x ] I don`t like smiling but do anyways.
[x] I know at least 3 people I would like to kick the crap out of.
[x] I love pranking people.
[x] Freaking hate a lot of people.
Total: 22

[x] People annoy me very easily.
[x] Some people are just flat out immature.
[x] I always have to get the last word.
[x] I always have the perfect comeback.
Total: 26

GRAND TOTAL: 26

Add up all the ex`s and multiply by 4.
Re-post this as " __ % Mean. "

25x4=100% (oh shit!)