Who Am I?

I love this song. :) 'Twas our theme song for the teaching stint I did last summer. I love it. Awe-inspiring. Plus some of my co-trainees managed to do a role play thingy that made us ALL cry -- including the pastors. Ahw. :|


Who am I? That the Lord of all the earthWould care to know my nameWould care to feel my hurtWho am I? That the Bright and Morning StarWould choose to light the wayFor my ever wandering heartNot because of who I amBut because of what You've doneNot because of what I've doneBut because of who You areI am a flower quickly fadingHere today and gone tomorrowA wave tossed in the oceanA vapor in the windStill You hear me when I'm callingLord, You catch me when I'm fallingand You've told me who i amI am Yours, I am YoursWho am I, that the eyes that see my sinWould look on me with love and watch me rise againWho am I, that the voice that calmed the seaWould call out through the rainAnd calm the storm in meNot because of who I amBut because of what You've doneNot because of what Ive doneBut because of who You areI am a flower quickly fadingHere today and gone tomorrowA wave tossed in the oceanA vapor in the windStill You hear me when I'm callingLord, You catch me when I'm fallingAnd You've told me who i amI am YoursI am a flower quickly fadingHere today and gone tomorrowA wave tossed in the oceanA vapor in the windStill You hear me when I'm callingLord, You catch me when I'm fallingAnd You’ve told me who I amI am Yours

Reminiscing. Hahaha.

We're in the midst of cleaning up and packing for the new home, and I recently unearthed this ridiculously embarrassing scrapbook from my senior high school year.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

FYI, the big middle picture is how I looked like in the sixth grade! Haha. They haven't released our senior pics pa at the time so yeah. :P

Here's some more funny peechors I found.

Hahahahaha! I'm laughing my lungs out.

There are even MORE embarrassing peechors, but I'm too lazy to scan them. Maita's in her awkward stage in life. Haha! Pre-contacts and braces era. O_O

Also, look how skinny I am in the second pic! That's Me, Yen and Maita stalking Mon Villarin outside Donnie's house. O_O

The last is of Madel and me. Naka caption pa, "on the set of Frenzy" Hahahahaha! I am such a lame-ass lewserrrrr.

I was such a loser in high school. Ohwell. I think everyone's entitled to be a lameass once in her/her life.

On second thought, Sheena recently uploaded some COLLEGE pictures. I still think I look like a loser. Funny kase I don't remember some of the pics being taken. O_O

Freaky.

I also unearthed some of the letters and cards my friends made for me. Ahw. Mum's letter was there, also. Wah! I kept bawling. I always cry when reading mum's letter. Aya's card also made me cry. She talked about Madel her and I being the best of friends no matter what happens. I wonder where she is now. The single rose she gave me was also still there. :) I put it in the middle of the card. There was also Madel's birthday letter-gift and Maita's note when I was leaving for college.

*cries*

PS: I wonder where my HS grad pic is? Hmm.

To the most important man in my life:

Happy birthday, Daddy! I love you so much! :) I miss you and I'll see you real soon, okay? :) Thank you for all the love you've showered us with; for the times you'd stay up at night when Tyn and I were sick, for slacking off from work to take care of me 'coz we didn't have a yaya. Thank you for all the sacrifices you've given us. I love you for doing your best to protect me from the evils of the universe. LOL.

Thanks for teaching me how to ride a bike and all that other stuff. Now you gotta teach me how to drive.

I love you always and forever! :)

Testing lang.

Gossip girl season2 episode 2.
PS: I can't believe someone from Catbalogan asked, "Does anyone one know when GG S02 starts?"

ROFLMAO. Retard.

I'm just checking if it works here. I like uploading dito sa Multips kse it takes lesser time then from YouTube *even if it is imported from YT.*

OHWELL.

Medicated.

I am pissed. Very very pissed. And highly emotional. I want to cry. And frustrated, tired, hungry. And it's HOT!

Crazy steroids. Or is the world just picking on me today?

Late Reaction.

I cried this afternoon. I think I watch too much Discovery channel. Hahaha. :) No. Seriously. They did a special on 9/11, and I couldn't resist. When you hear about stuff like this on the news; you get concerned, say a little prayer, talk about it with your family -- but you don't know what its like. You can't even begin to fathom what the victims went through and how it must be for the families they left behind. America is supposedly known as the land of the free and the home of the brave; and that freedom and bravery was tested on September 11, 2001.

Whenever I'd think about the tragedy, I'd think about America in general. I'd think about Bill Clinton and how lucky he must've felt by not having to be president of the US anymore. Then I'd ponder on Bush and stare in awe at how fast his hair turned white, or how old he got in just a few days. I would always wonder what the H*LL was going on in Bin Ladin's sick mind. I saw pictures of ground zero and I remember thinking about a road trip we were planning to upstate NYC. I'll never get to see the twin towers. Ever.

The passengers on board those planes were real people with real lives. They had families to go home to, they had lives to live. And that's what made me break down -- A woman, three months pregnant for the first time after trying for five years; the twenty-year old college girl; the thirty-something happy go lucky guy who just attended his grandparent's 100th birthday; a police officer with three children -- different people from different races and cultures, from all walks of life. Innocent people. Dead people.

When the twin towers and the pentagon went down, they took a huge chunk of American spirit with them. The country is still a bit shaken, there's still hope. There will always be hope. And there will always be faith.

For the land of the free, and the home of the brave. :)

PS: I heard that the Golden Gate and 7-mile bridges were targets that day, too! Wahh! I'm putting it on my lists to visit when I get back before some terrorists decide to bomb it down or something. :|


PPS: I love America. And the Philippines. And when I'm here, I cry whenever I hear the Star Spangled Banner. And I know I'll cry when I'm NOT here for good anymore and hear the Lupang Hinirang. :)

Signs of Aging.

I think I'm getting old.

Was supposed to do some studying last night, but then I remembered that London Ink was premiering on TV so I decided to watch just ONE episode. I didn't like it. Boo. Was about to turn the telly off, but I saw that Miami Ink was up next. Yey! I love Miami Ink to death. :) Almost all their tattoo artists are hotttt and every time I watch the show, I want to get my own tat. I feel bad now that Kat Von D isn't there anymore (bitch left to open up her own LA ink), but ohwell.

Miami beach is a good twenty minute drive from where we live. Let's see if I get one in about two years!

So. Post Miami Ink indulgence, I started flipping channels and saw Mariah Carey on Myx singing "Can't Take That Away". Ahw. I love that song! Syempre, I couldn't resist but singing along (hahahahaha). Bedeful, bedeful. :) Encore! Encore! Then the music changed and an even better song came on. Stan by Eminem. Hey! That was like, an epidemic back in high school! So of course, I started singing along too. 'Til the song came to an end an the VJ said, "and that's myx backtraxx...."

BACKTRAXX? I'm THAT old? Music from my time is already on BACKTRAXX? LOLOLOLOLOLOL.

So ANYWAYS, now I'm trying to do a wee bit studying for our killer exams and problem sets due this weekend. But I can't because our neighbor's yaya is too malandi to shut her ugly trap. UGH. I hate that yaya kase she was the one who was forming diabolical plans alongside our former feeling artista maid. GRR. Now she's screaming and giggling outside the compound and its GROSS.

I wonder if she actually thinks she can seduce someone? Gahd I have to study. There's so much coverage and I haven't even started. I haven't even looked at the coverage! :| I want to drop out, but we're only two sessions 'til finals. Also, there's these words that my friend Sheena once blogged, "What's going to happen if I quit every time things get hard?" (or something like that, hahahaha)

Ohwell. I want to blog on more stuff but maybe later. My chest is all tight again. Bahhhhhhhh

Mothers are ALWAYS right.

ALWAYS.

Beyond reasonable doubt.

About a year ago, I THOUGHT I needed help getting my NCLEX papers done. So I went to this agency that charges two thousand pesos for services. Mum said that the idea of having some amateur agency take over my papers was absurd and definitely useless. But I was insistent, so mother handed me the two grand.

That agency is USELESS. They work for the states that are always applied for like California, but how about the state that I need? Why don't they call themselves the nursing agency for California-bound nurses instead? BETTER YET, why didn't they tell me that they CAN'T take on my complicated case?

It's almost a year now and my application to Florida is about to expire. PRC has already responded but I'm not sure if they were able to forward my papers to the CGFNS na for my credentials evaluation.

I don't wanna freakin' pay another ten thousand pesos just to take the NCLEX. We already paid ten thousand last year and we paid another seventeen thousand for the credentials thingy. Fuckiddddd.

This would've been avoided if only PRC told me that my license was put on hold in the first place. I was always there, calling and visiting them. They kept telling me to come back next week, etc. Why didn't they tell me there was something wrong with my license? Saying they didn't know isn't an answer. It's their JOB to know. I don't give a flying fcuk if they're BUSY, they have to find out!

(I'm thinking about pressing charges, but I don't know where to start)

So anyways, back to the lousy third world province agency. Oh yes.

I've sent dozens of emails to the Florida BON about my situation, but they haven't responded. I'm toying with the notion of calling them, too. Thing is, I paid an AGENCY to do it for me, right? Wrong. I remember the woman with harassed looking hair at the desk and it sends shivers up and down my spine. SHE'S going to represent ME? And talk to a BON agent in ENGLISH? I'll do it myself.

Which is basically my point. Why'd I have to pay a stupid agency, anyways? All they want to do is cater to Cali or Saipan takers because its all they can do. Because even a retard could do that with their eyes closed. But they can't do my case (because it's complicated and Florida has too many requirements) so why'd they take my freakin' money in the first place?

Okay mom was right. And was right when she told me that reviewing for the NCLEX in Cebu is a bad idea, too. I didn't get anything out of it except for a depleted ATM alot of shoes I don't use anymore.

Hayy. I'm sorry, Mummy. :| :| :|

Updates: Recovery and Relapse

Was sick starting Monday (yesterday) with the flu and asthma meds' side effects. :| Popped in some Bioflu and felt better in the morning but I'm still feeling a bit woozy as of the moment. Bah.

BFF dedes visited me yesterday. :D Gah, I bet I smelled bad at the time kay was trying to get myself to sweat off the flu. PLUS I was having MAJOR chills that hurt my muscles. Thanks for the smidgets, Babz! Thats all I ate coz its all I can taste. :) Hehe.
I have an exam on Saturday. And problem sets AGAIN! I don't think stat would be as hard if our prof didn't merge those taking up Basic Stat1 with the doctorates taking up Advanced stat2. I mean c'mon! Gah!

Watched and uploaded OTH S05 E02. :) Whee! The suspense is KILLING ME! :) Poor Brooke. :| Why does she have to be some frickin' martyr and all? I really don't like Peyton/Lucas together. Their relationship hurts and tramples on too many people along the way. BUT I just can't help but smile seeing them together. :)

I'm also watching episodes here and there of Miami Ink. Gahd I love this show. :D I'm trying to look for the s01 episodes but i can't. :|

We have a new maid. Yey! She's Manananggal's kid, and I think she might have some stupidity issues. I have to tell her to do things twice and all she does is give me this blank stare. She also answers to questions very slowlyyyyyyy. BUT I think she's gonna be okay. Not JENNY okay, but better than Jane okay. So it's fine with me. I'm getting tired of hogging up all the household chores. Hahahaha

Since I'm not the maid anymore, I have a new job. I haven't started, but check out Noble News and Reviews by Miss Elle. She's currently "not fit" to blog as of the moment, so I'll be taking over it for her. LOL. The idea kinda SCARES me because her blog is BIG SHOES TO FILL. BUT I'll do my best. :)

Thazall. *Lame blog*

PS: Can I vent? I hate having to deal with people from my multiply business site. When you say NEGOTIABLE, it isn't SYNONYMOUS to NAME YOUR PRICE you morons! You ASK for a price then we negotiate on it. And please don't text me at wee hours in the morning asking for stupid questions like if you can get my divicam for 5.5k. Do you want me to give it to you instead? GRR.

I also think EBAYers are stupid. And twice more demanding than multipliers. One just texted me now. "How much is the buy it now price for your P300 havs? REPLY ASAP"

WTH. I WOULD HAVE replied ASAP, but since s/he pissed me off, I'm deciding not to reply at all. Hahahahahahaha. :)

I almost died.

Just kidding. I bet ALOT got disappointed that the title was a joke, eh? Hahaha. My apologies. I shouldn't put peoples' hopes up like that.

Truth is, I was almost rushed to the hospital at two in the morning. Stupid lungs.

At around 8:00pm I was already feeling sleepy but decided to fight it para dretso na for the night sleep and stuff. So I read a little, watched a little, ate a little *HAHAHAHAHAHA* At around 11, I decided to hit the sack. Then I started coughing. And I was like, "oh wow. NOW I get a cough. Isn't cough season supposed to be over?" Then it started getting rowdy. And I was like, "Oh you stupid rhinitis. Here you go again!*

So I popped in some Claritin and expected things to be good.

cough cough cough. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH.

ARGH! Why won't the stupid medicine work? So I decided that maybe I've increased tolerance for the drug and decided to pop in ANOTHER 500mg.

cough cough cough. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH. COUGH COUGH COUGH.

What the hell???

Is that BLOOD I taste? I'm coughing up BLOOD?

Conscious mind: Do you have TB, Kim?
Subconscious mind: Kim can't have TB! She's always cooped up inside the house. No exposure
Conscious mind: So what can you get from lying around all day? OH! Pneumonia?
Subconscious mind: All she has is a dry cough; and her throat could be raw from all that hacking
Conscious mind: So its her rhinitis again
Subconscious mind: What else could it be?
Conscious mind: But her NOSE is perfectly clear. See? And can't you hear all that crackling and wheezing from her breathing?
Subconscious mind: Asthma? But she doesn't have a history, right?
Conscious mind: She was never diagnosed, if that's what you're thinking. But it's pretty strong in their family history

MOMMY: Kim? KIM?! What's wrong? Do we need to take you to the hospital?

Subconscious: Yes, Kim needs to go to the hospital
Conscious: She'll be given an IV of epinephrine.

ME:

Subconscious: There must be some other way!

MENTAL FLASHBACK: January 19, 2008. Ayala Cebu.

Asthma/rhinitis/whatever you call it attacks again. Was to meet Sheena, Sam, Chi Cindy and Te Chiex.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
ARE YOU OKAY?
HOYYYYY. WRONG MEDICATION! WRONG MEDICATION KA!
COUGH SYRUP/NEOZEP DAPAT! NOT BENADRYL!

Me: *fuzz fuzz fuzz*

END OF FLASHBACK.

Conscious mind: There's Robitussin downstairs. And Neozep's in the first aid kit
Subconscious mind: Robitussin's an expectorant. So it means she'll be coughing up her lungs at this point. I don't think she needs a push in loosening her secretions, if you know what I mean
Conscious mind: Yes, yes. Kim's drinking the Claritin to dilate her airways AND help her sleep
Subconscious mind: But its not enough. We need something to dilate her airways MORE!
Conscious mind: Now. If I were a stupid constricted bronchiole cutting of air, what would I need?

BOTH MINDS: HOT WATER! DRINK HOT WATER!

Mom: Kim? KIM! Come on. I'm bringing you to the hospital. Tin. Ready na the bags. Come on
Me: No. No. I'm okay. Never mind.

Subconscious mind: Fowler's position! Fowler's position!
Conscious mind: HIGH FOWLER'S! HIGH FOWLER'S!
Subconscious mind: NOT WORKING! ORTHOPNEIC POSITION! ORTHOPNEIC POSITION!

LUNGS: Crackle, crackle. Wheeze, wheeze. Crackle, Wheeze.

BRAIN: Dilate, bronchioles! Dilate!

LUNGS: Crackle, wheeze.

BRAIN: *fuzz fuzz*

'Til I fell asleep. It took 1000mg of Claritin to make my brain drowse. Woke up again coz my neck was so stiff from the stupid super high fowler's position.

Gahd, that was terrible! El terrible! :|

Will go to the pulmo tomorrow. I hope I don't need some asthmatic inhaler! They have steroids that make you FAT! :| Maybe I should do some wall climbing? Hmm.